I know that there’s a teenager advice community of some flavour floating around in the Blåhaj server. But I’m gonna take a guess that the only reason it’s there is because people who can’t just scroll past things were downvoting it. I have a feeling that if an instance or multiple communities for teenagers popped up, the users here would probably terrorize it until it all closed down.

What made me leave Facebook was discovering Reddit. What made me leave Reddit was getting banned lol. What made me leave Twitter (or never actually ever bother much with it) is that it seems more like a big popularity contest than ‘social’ platform to me. Besides, if it was really social, there wouldn’t be a character limit that benefits marketing speak and hashtags more than constructive conversation.

Never saw the point of places like Instagram that are based on being able to upload photos. Big deal, you can upload photos anywhere. And the only time I use YouTube is when I’m in the mood for music videos. I have less than zero interest in watching people’s crappy home videos, it’s like reality TV but even more boring and brain rotting. And I’ve got better things to spend my time watching. Oh, and I tried TikTok but noped out very quickly. I see absolutely no value in being spoonfed content by some shady algorithm as opposed to choosing and curating your own content.

Personally, I do not care if the platform that I’m on uses my data to advertise to me. I fell in with the ‘privacy’ crowd like a decade ago and did my time shaking my fists at big brother but I just don’t care anymore. None of this is new. As long as the people on the platform are the kind of people that I could get along with, I’m fine. And quite capable of using an ad blocker if I so desire. I couldn’t care less if Reddit used my posts in the Xena or She-Ra subreddits to advertise romance fantasy novels to me. There’s more important things to focus on.

I remember the cheat but not the exact game lol. Definitely Sega Mega Drive though.

ABRACADABRA (R for d-pad right, D for d-pad down).

Going by a Google search it could’ve been Vectorman or Ecco 2. Or both because I played both a lot back then.

I only noticed this in my feed now, so I’m late but I guess that’s how it is on a platform with relatively low activity.

I also used to “fall in love” easily when I was young, so I feel like I can have quite a bit to say here. It’s going to be a long post though.

If you’re anything like I was, it almost feels like what being bipolar must feel like because you’re fully aware that you’re behaving badly but it’s like the chemicals in your brain have gone haywire so you’re not completely in the driver’s seat. And I just want to say, that’s not ‘love’. It’s a slow release poison that is killing you and any chance of love.

Personally I actually just bowed out of relationships for a long time because I knew that I was the problem that needed to solved first. I would maybe suggest making the conscious decision to stop thinking of relationships or “possible future partners” as even being a goal for a while. Make friends along the way but the person that you need to get to know first is yourself. And don’t completely shut yourself off to having a bit of naughty fun once in a while either. But don’t ever expect it or feel like you’re owed it and if it comes along, do it with the mentality of no strings attached as a default instead of immediately seeing wedding bells in the future.

Just be careful though because once you learn to be happy in your relationship with yourself, it can be addictive. I kept it going for a little too long myself, so now I’m at the point where even though I wouldn’t mind having a special someone, the idea of sharing a bed and a cupboard etc. kinda repulses me. I’m going to have to find a very specific kind of person that wants both love and independence at the same time at this point lol.

But that’s part of finding out who you are. In fact part of my problem is that I’m at the very least aromantic. I just do not know how to receive or give the same cues that everyone else seems to be tuned into. So I mimicked my idea of ‘romance’ from romcoms and shit. And (metaphorically speaking because I wasn’t quite that bad) I thought that serenading her with a guitar outside her window or chasing her down at the airport was how it was done and not borderline stalker behavior in the eyes of the person being ‘serenaded’ or chased. Also (and it took me a long time to come to this conclusion because I come from a country where we weren’t educated on all this stuff), I have come to find that I am actually somewhere around non-binary in the gender spectrum and I think that people around me could tell that I wasn’t completely cis long before I knew.

That’s my journey though. You need to find your own answers. My point is that now I am better equipped with the knowledge that I need to try again. Some people have it all figured out from the start, some of us take a while longer.

Aaand sorry to keep going on but I’m also going to punt Relationship Anarchy. It’s actually more about polyamory but I think that there’s a lot of good ideas in here that can be applied to monogamous relationships or even just friendships. Namely as far as your jealousy issues go, I’m going to quote two sections.

Love and respect instead of entitlement:

Deciding to not base a relationship on a foundation of entitlement is about respecting others’ independence and self-determination. Your feelings for a person or your history together does not make you entitled to command and control a partner to comply with what is considered normal to do in a relationship. Explore how you can engage without stepping over boundaries and personal beliefs. Rather than looking for compromises in every situation, let loved ones choose paths that keep their integrity intact, without letting this mean a crisis for the relationship. Staying away from entitlement and demands is the only way to be sure that you are in a relationship that is truly mutual. Love is not more “real” when people compromise for each other because it’s part of what’s expected.

Trust is better

Choosing to assume that your partner does not wish you harm leads you down a much more positive path than a distrustful approach where you need to be constantly validated by the other person to trust that they are there with you in the relationship. Sometimes people have so much going on inside themselves that there’s just no energy left to reach out and care for others. Create the kind of relationship where withdrawing is both supported and quickly forgiven, and give people lots of chances to talk, explain, see you and be responsible in the relationship. Remember your core values and to take care of yourself though!

And that is that. Sorry for the essay.

RoboCop, the Alien movies, Hellraiser. Honestly a lot of the old Jean Claude van Damme movies are fairly hardcore for kids, looking back. Probably a lot of movies because I was allowed to stay up until whenever on weekends from pretty young.

Just went there. Top post is politics, next post is about a touchy feely doctor, there’s a few about body image, more politics, a reminder to not use period tracker apps because the USA government is literally taking women’s rights over their own bodies away, dating advice, more politics.

Looks to me like a women-oriented subreddit for discussing women’s issues, just like it always has. Could you point out some of these ‘femcels’ there to me? Should they be praising the Trump administration, swooning over pervert doctors and sharing Andrew Tate screenshots instead?

Maybe a lot are a bit angry there but I think they’ve got every fucking right to be angry right now. Don’t you?

If you think twoxchromosomes is bad because women there had the nerve to talk about their bad experiences, then actual feminist subs must’ve terrified you.

Based on what I’ve learnt, what’s holding Lemmy back is that a large amount of users are fucking man babies that brigade any women-oriented communities and drive women in general away from this place, while admins just sit back and allow them to. The Lemmy mouse needs a fedora.

The way I see it, the slippery slope that we’re currently on is tolerating nazis and bigots.

Firstly the obligatory disclaimer that I’m not American, just someone that has been watching this unfold on the same world wide web that we all use.

Maybe I’m too radical but I would say fully. Whether they want a white christian nationalist country or just wanted cheaper eggs. Because that first thing was never a hidden objective, it was clear from the start. We had people who find secret illuminati pizza messages on bathroom walls take one look at Project 2025, an actual real conspiracy and go “doesn’t look like anything to me”.

So whether they’re true right wingers, conspiracy theorists, or people that closed their eyes and ears and hearts while convincing themselves that this was all about cheaper groceries; I’d say they’re all equally to blame.

English or history. They were both subjects in high school where I could not even study and just wing it with walls of text. As long as spelling and grammar and shit were good and in the case of history, being able to refer to key things from the text book occasionally, I was scoring in the 90s. I’ve gone a bit feral in that regard over the years since then but if my path was to be a teacher, I think that’s what I would’ve gone for.

Just want to add that a big deciding factor in that as well is how cool my english and history teachers in high school were. A married couple that I honestly credit with helping shape certain good parts of who I am. I was honestly borderline anarchistic (definitely anti-authoritarian) in my writings and I think they liked it and nurtured it a little bit.

One moment that stuck with me that I never realised the significance of was my history teacher bringing up how schools have a hidden curriculum. How beyond being taught how to behave in society, it also enforces cultural things like one race’s set of norms and standards or teaching boys to behave like boys and girls to behave like girls (which is a line I even specifically remember him using). And I remember being a little bit outraged about the idea of a hidden curriculum and this fucking guy smiled and kept the conversation going and told me more.

Here’s to you Mr. and Mrs. Owen. They’d be pretty old if they were still alive. I’d be either an english or history teacher because of them.

Edit: just for extra context, for high school I went a boarding school in a very Christian and religious small town and it wasn’t the best of times for me, to say the least. There were a couple of decent teachers but most are wrinkled up, mean, dogmatic pieces of shit in my memory. So these two teachers were special.

I’m only a day in of trying to get away from this, and I’m mostly talking about Lemmy right now (but it would also work / help on Bluesky), but something that’s already made a huge difference for me personally since yesterday, is separating the feeds. I woke up this morning and scrolled through content that didn’t make me want to start a revolution first thing in the morning and I’m already having a pretty good day for it.

I decided to cut most news and politics out of my subscriptions, other than maybe some small communities that don’t show up on ‘All’ on a 24 hour cycle. So from now on, my subscriptions will be only things that interest me and not enrage me. And ‘All’ is still there if I happen to feel like indulging in the rage for a little bit.

Also, finding a server that’s more tailored to what you personally vibe with adds a 3rd option in the ‘Local’ tab for a feed that doesn’t destroy your soul piece by piece.

So the ‘Reddit’ experience is still there in the ‘All’ tab, for everything. From rage to cool shit you haven’t subscribed to yet. But you don’t have to spend all day there. You can fill the other two tabs with stuff that makes you smile or learn or that aligns with your interests / career / philosophy or whatever. And spend more time there.

I was doing the same when I gave Bluesky a try, making use of different feeds for different things. Keep the news and politics in its own tab and only go there when you feel like catching up, or if you’re specifically in the mood to rage against the machine.